Originally posted on The Road: By Rachel Jankovic A few years ago, when I just had four children and when the oldest was still three, I loaded them all up to go on a walk. After the final sippy cup had found a place and we were ready to go, my two-year-old turned to me…
I have many posts in draft, including one that has been asked several times here or via emails on what I think about women in ministry… it is coming, it’s just so complicated and long I’ve been trying to pare it down to a more easy-to-read post.
We’ve going through lots of things this past school year! Homeschool has been amazing, even though sometimes it can be harder some days than others. For the most part, it has been wonderful getting to really focus on teaching our older son (and to some degree our younger son) things that we feel the school system was deliberately leaving out or twisting to be seen from a false narrative. And we’re able to focus so much more on Christian ethics and morals in our lessons, and involve the Christian aspects behind historical stories and even in science.
And going through Pilgrim’s Progress has just been AMAZING for our son. Again, I cannot reccommend this book enough to families with children! It is a MUST read for the strengthening of their faith (and for yours!). Just read it, and honor it in your house. I’m sure the sweet author John Bunyan may have gotten some things wrong, but overall it is very on point and a good tool for building a child’s faith.
In other news, some of you may remember we’ve been trying to have another child.
It’s just been taking longer than we expected, which isn’t really “bad,” but every month when I find out I’m not pregnant, I feel this emptiness and longing… and tell my husband how I just simply want to have another of his babies. It’s a very strange and sad kind of emptiness. And I’m so so sorry to sound so selfish to any women out there who have dealt with never having a child. I’m not in any way trying to minimize your pain – I’m sure I should be happy that we have 3 already (and I am!), but it IS just a strange kind of thing that I’m going through each month that I’m not able to conceive. I knew it would probably take longer… I’m far older than I was when we had our first (almost a decade!) and I’m accepting that maybe it’s not possible.
I definitely am not trying to make it a big deal, and some people in our circle think I’m ridiculous for even wanting more children 😦 , but to be honest, it has just been a little depressing and hard. And I never thought I’d feel those feelings when needing to wait or having to accept that … maybe 3 kids is “it?” It’s ok, and I still love and trust God so much, but I’ve been surprised at these feelings inside.
That and we’ve been through an intense few months of my husband studying for a work thing… something that took him away almost every second of him being off, but thankfully that season is over and we’re more into a, “let’s finish school strong,” mode 🙂 .
We’ve actually become busier as I’ve started to teach another sweet little boy (5 yr old) who is the grandson of our neighbor. His father and mother had him out of wedlock in high school (she was only 16), and have both abandoned him to other life choices (her drugs and he’s off at college very far away). He’s practically an orphan and it is just so hard to see up close and personal what that does to a child.
We’ve watched ALL of this play out over the years we’ve lived next to his grandmother. And now she’s called upon me to kind of repair what they’ve broken and neglected. He can’t even read or write well, and I’ve been gently teaching him just the basics, and thankfully it’s been working and hopefully in a small way, it will help him. It’s so tragic. He is so sweet, and my husband even wants to adopt him. He’s basically become almost a part of our family as he’s over every day, and just kind of folded into the fabric of our life.
Something that’s been such a blessing in this busy season has been the mom’s group I’ve talked about before. It’s a group that’s mostly made up of very large, home-schooling families… think 4+ kids per mom who attends! It is incredible the stuff I’m learning in this group ❤ and SO fulfilling to be around other like-minded women and children it’s hard to describe how nice it is.
So with all that above, we’ve just been so. incredibly. busy. And I’m exhausted, but it’s a good exhausted. 🙂
We’ve been in such a busy season recently, that I’ve again come to be so grateful for having an established morning quiet time reading God’s Word and connecting to His grace. We still have a very packed schedule, even though with homeschooling there is lots of relaxing time and outside, unstructured play… if I had to pinpoint it, the most strenuous part of our day is our workout routine (lol). Yesterday my husband and I ran 6 miles (!!!), so I’m not kidding when I say it is intense and somewhat brutal. So I need the peace and replenishment of morning quiet time ❤
There is something so strange and powerful that I feel when I make these morning quiet times a priority in my life. I was reflecting as I was reading yesterday morning, yet again with our little daughter up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed sitting right next me reading along with her baby Bible book as well, just how wonderful it is to do this practice.
I came across Psalm 19 –
“The instruction from the Lord is perfect,
reviving the soul;
the testimony of the Lord is trustworthy,
making the inexperienced wise.
The precepts of the Lord are right,
making the heart glad;
the commandment of the Lord is radiant,
making the eyes light up.
The fear of the Lord is pure,
the ordinances of the Lord are reliable and altogether righteous.
They are more desirable than gold;
and sweeter than honey -than honey dripping from the comb.
In addition, Your servant (me) is warned by them;
there is great reward in keeping them.” Psalm 19:7-11 CSB
No wonder I’m a forever optimist!!! 😀 Look at what happens to a person when they make the time to read God’s Word with an open heart and understanding in the morning!
Let me break down all those words again in a list. God’s Word is:
And here is how we are told it effects us when we read it:
- Revives our soul
- Makes us wise
- Makes the heart glad!
- Makes the eyes light up!
- Gives us good warnings
- Gives us reward in keeping His ways
Wow, right!?!?! That is what I feel though when I make time in the morning. I can testify that all these things talked about in Psalm 19 are true; it’s why I’ve tried to always guard this time, even when we have babies still not sleeping through the night. It’s almost crucial to my mental strength, as you can see, His Word has the power to renew one’s faith and optimism, and it renews daily!
And… can I just say… these are MORNING words in my opinion 🙂 . “Reviving the soul,” and, “making the heart glad,” and “making the eyes light up,” these really do sound like a daily morning renewal before one tackles their day.
And what better time to get your replenishment and renewal of faith and optimism, “making your heart glad,” and your “eyes light up,” than in the morning? 😀 It’s like your spiritual cup of coffee (jk… but seriously), just like I couldn’t imagine going without that stimulant in my morning routine, I know how I feel when I bypass this practice because I’ve slept in (been lazy) or just too busy to make the time for it (refusing to meet with God even though I could have).
All this is not to say that you can’t also read it at night and feel relief after a terrible day – that is true also – but I’ve found it to be better to do what Jesus did, and get up early in the morning to devote the first fruits of your day to Him. But God’s Word is powerful and can’t be “boxed,” in, hence why I believe this is also true when one reads it at night. David has many Psalms where he meditated on God’s Word in the morning AND at night, but here is main morning one that convicts me,
“IN THE MORNING, oh Lord,
You hear my voice;
IN THE MORNING,
I lay my requests before You, and wait in expectation.”
Here is what I wrote in an older post on this topic… it’s interesting to look back and see what I was describing to be found so clear in this passage of Psalm 19, again confirming what I was trying to say. From here –
“Rising Early … with babies?
Throughout the years of our marriage, even with having multiple children – babies nursing at all times of the night, I still find that waking up early (5am or 5:30am) to spend that quiet time with God is so crucial to my faith longterm – and it impacts my entire day! I’m just not the same without it. He literally changes my perspective and helps me deal with the day ahead with a much better attitude. I’m definitely not perfect or always want to follow through with this goal. There are some times when I’m not able to get up early, but I do notice a difference in my heart and attitude if I miss a couple of days in a row. I need God all day, but especially in the early mornings before anyone else has woken up, so that I can spend time alone with Him and reading and studying His Word.
There’s also the principle of giving God your “first fruits.” For anyone who has ever seriously studied the Bible, it’s apparent that God wants our best – and yes, that usually means we are required to sacrifice in order to give it to Him. He wants our “first fruits.”
The first 10% of your pay (the normal tithe), the firstborn of your children (an Old Testament Jewish custom), the first day of the week devoted to Him (the Sabbath), even the first of the people’s grain (their food) was to be given to the Lord – before they were allowed to harvest anything for themselves! It makes total sense that a woman’s early morning time should probably be first devoted to God, no matter when she wakes up.
In fact, Jesus Himself spent time alone with His Father early in the morning. There’s something just very mysterious about that early morning time that even I can’t put my finger on.
“AND IN THE MORNING, rising up a great while before the day, He went out, and departed into a solitary place, and there prayed.” — MARK 1:35
I noticed last year, and I’m usually late to notice these trends so maybe this has been going on for longer, women everywhere online have started to celebrate a holiday called “International Women’s Day.” Sometimes it is celebrated by going on strike and refusing to work or show up to their obligations. And sometimes it’s simply celebrated by posting a photo online of the woman standing there, looking proud, and wearing a shirt with this on it:
It is almost the like Emperor who wore no clothes, as women can’t seem to, “see,” that having a day that is supposed to celebrate their intellect, strength, and beauty in being a woman, doesn’t have to mean vulgarity, losing their jobs because they didn’t show up, or walking around angry for a
Melting Down Purity Rings into a Golden Vagina
But it gets worse than that. Christianity has been assaulted (obviously) and the assault is winning dramatically more than any defense made to push it back. We now have “Pastors,” like the female(?) pictured who actually have melted down purity rings into order to make a golden vagina
From the False Prophet female pastor –
“This thing about women that the church has tried to hide and control and that is a canvas on which other people can write their own righteousness ― it’s actually ours,” Bolz-Weber told HuffPost. “This part of me is mine and I get to determine what is good for it and if it’s beautiful and how I use it in the world.”
In the end, Klein writes, purity culture essentially taught girls that they were responsible not only for their own chastity, but also for that of the boys around them. Girls who had premarital sex were compared to “used” cars, tissues and gum that no one else would want. Purity culture had a particularly devastating and dangerous effect on gay and lesbian teens, since in condemning all sex outside a heterosexual marriage, it left them with no hope for a future relationship. Ultimately, girls were led to believe that their sexual thoughts and choices determined their spiritual standing in the eyes of God.
“The difference between purity and holiness is that purity is always about separation ― separating ourselves from people who are less religious, separating ourselves from our sexual natures, from our desires,” Bolz-Weber explained. “But holiness is always about connection ― to God, to ourselves, to our nature.”
I was the right age when experiencing the purity culture, had a purity ring and signed the, “True Love Waits,” pledge, and while many women claim it “damaged,” them to become aware of the consequences of the choices they would eventually decide to make, I know I benefited from the messages to save sex for marriage.
I know women who used to be normal Christian girls going to the same religious school I did, and went extremely wild in college and when they moved away to urban cities, so wild that it was unbelievable to watch. Of course they’d look back at those promises they made to God and to others to keep themselves pure, and feel intense regret, anger, inward shame, and then be tempted to throw it all out as “BS.”
Of course they’d think melting their former purity rings down into a golden vagina could “redeem,” them from their choices to rebel and go wild and degrade themselves in alllll kinds of ways that I saw happening 😦 . Instead of letting shame lead to repentance and redemption, they are choosing the path of rebellion and joining with dark forces to take down the entire “purity culture,” with their hats, costumes, and ultimately, idols.
But why the obsession with the female reproductive parts? Why are women marching (and keep in mind a lot of this seems to have started, or gotten worse, after Trump won) with “pussy” hats on their heads?
Why are there now shirts even Christians are wearing that claim God came out of a woman’s “vulva?”
But more importantly, why all the obsession with the female vagina?
“God came out of a vulva…”
we need to wear “pussy hats” to defend ourselves…
or vagina costumes...
or let’s make a
golden calf I mean vagina out of our purity rings, and that will save us.
My guess? My analysis of this very strange phenomenon where I’ve witnessed longtime friends (who were very devout religious people… one who almost gave her life to become a nun she was so pure and sweet, and once… very wise) are now donning these symbols, is it comes down to an intoxicating kind of idolatry. I think it’s something females are more easily tempted into obviously, so it may sound strange to any man reading this, but this is (I believe) a strange kind of idolatry we haven’t seen in this age, but has been present before.
“GOD works so that people will be in awe of Him.
Whatever is, has already been, and whatever will be, already is. GOD repeats the past.”
I’m sure there are many religious scholars out there who could explain this far better than I can, (and if you know of any, please add a link in the comments), but female goddess worship and literal vagina worship has been around almost since time began. The Bible assures us that what we are seeing now, has been seen before, and it is all basically saying the same thing. Yes, even the “Christians,” wearing shirts saying their God came out of a vulva, completely degrading the sacredness of Christ’s birth and holiness.
They’re all saying this:
That picture up above was not created by myself. I’ve found (personally unfortunately) that quite a few Christians out there are wearing things like that. And with what these (once sane, as I can testify) women are doing, is basically saying this same sentiment. God is ONLY God, because He came from a vulva. The vagina is so holy, it is something we should make a, quite literal, golden idol out of. It is, at it’s root, satanic.
Cleaning up the mess the STRONG women are making
The unfortunate thing… is that the kind of woman who actually does exhibit strength, ability to keep commitments like work, persistence and in general… is a responsible adult, has to regularly clean up the mess the “STRONG Women” are making and leaving behind. Whether it’s literally, like the above photo where a FEMALE janitor was having to clean up their Strong Women graffiti, or figuratively, as in we’re having to work harder to keep our kids’ values straight, and to keep our own daughters from being infected with this (apparently intoxicating?) disease.
This is not real strength. These are not strong women. What they are displaying are their glaring weaknesses and shortcomings where they haven’t matured into full adulthood of being resilient (possessing inner strength), responsible, and conscientious.
They are so weak in character, that they don’t care if children read their shirts or see their vagina costumes; guarding children’s innocence (something a truly strong woman would do) is not on their agenda. Because their vain selfishness is on full display to all society, they are wearing these symbols in order to promote the murder of children inside the womb, and right when they’ve been born (infanticide). So of course their moral fabric isn’t twinged at the thought of children seeing these things, they’re more concerned with their rights to murder these same children before they get bigger.
No, these are not strong women. May you learn the difference between pseudo-strength, and true resilience and strength of character.
“She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong.
Strength & honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come.”
Proverbs 31:17, 25
Oral Roberts heard the voice of God in a vision speak to the American Lukewarm church. God said, “THERE IS A WASTING OF MY POWER, THERE IS A FAILURE TO GRASP THE END TIME. AND THE CHURCH, THEY ARE COMING TO CHURCH ON SUNDAY MORNING MOSTLY FOR THEMSELVES. AND THE PREACHERS, FOR THE MOST PART, […]
Our boys watched this as part of the homeschooling science experience when learning about the different biomes, specifically, the rainforest, desert, and tundra. The oldest had to pick one to do a mini project on, and he hands-down picked the desert!
Oh what fun!!!! So we’ve been diving into the adventure of EVERYTHING to know about the desert, and one thing he thought would be interesting was to learn how one would survive if they were ever stuck out in the desert for a period of time.
Thought this video might be something others would like 😀 there is a part 2, however we haven’t watched that one yet.
I have to say though, both boys were glued to the screen the entire 36 minutes long, even though a lot of it is just talking and explaining, they LOVED watching this man teach them that much!
If anyone who happens to be reading this post has ever had experience living or camping (or surviving!!) in a desert, I’d very much appreciate your take on this video (and your personal experience in general)!
To my Sweet One, we’ve talked about many things that are good, bright, and positive, but now it’s time to talk about a more melancholy state, when you will go through dark times. More specifically, when you’re in a Valley of Humiliation.
Right now, in 2019, we’re going through the book Pilgrim’s Progress with your oldest brother, and this was such a good lesson I couldn’t wait to share it with you in here. We will also read this book with you, however I still wanted this lesson to be formally preserved in your book.
What is the Valley of Humiliation?
The Valley of Humiliation in John Bunyan’s Pilgrim’s Progress, is an allegory to when we go through extremely difficult seasons of being humbled. It can be from friends, but most likely the humbling or humiliation comes from people we call enemies. It might not come from a person themselves at all, however, but simply be a time or season in your life when everything seems to be going terribly wrong, or you have no direction or can’t discern anymore from God which way is right to take. Often it is a combination of all these things, which is what Pilgrim’s Progress describes, and is a season of affliction coupled with attacks meant to humiliate. Whatever this Valley may look like at a certain time is not as important compared to the necessity of this being something you need to learn how to handle, and how to handle well.
May you be a lady of wisdom, who when she is rightfully humbled, realizes it and acknowledges it with grace. And may you have the wisdom to see even the slightest bit of Truth in a severely harsh rebuke or criticism, and choose to treasure it, instead of despising the Truth. I will strive to give you many examples of my own (mostly failings) experience with this, and what I wish I had done differently.
I can tell you assuredly though, accepting humiliation with a graceful and humble attitude reveals a beauty in a person like nothing one usually sees in this world. It is very rare, because I believe this is the attitude that most models Christ. Everything in our world today tells you not to accept going through this Valley. That you will look foolish. But the world’s “wisdom,” is not God’s wisdom, and it is foolish to seek to avoid these times of humbling.
And something you need to understand is that everyone eventually goes through a valley, or several valleys of being humbled or humiliated in all kinds of ways. No single person is allowed to avoid this pain, and it is something all of us must learn to “deal,” with in wise and graceful ways.
You can’t run away from a season of being humbled or humiliated, that only seals your fate as someone not strong enough to bear the name of Christ! It is designed this way to test your faith, to see if you’re strong enough to hold steadfast to your anchor in the storms of life.
Also, as we discussed in depth with your oldest brother, Pilgrim’s Progress points out that you don’t have armor for your back. This means that if you flee in terror, or run away not trusting in God’s strength to pull you through (and perfect your character through humiliation), you will be attacked from behind as you are fleeing!
At the Christian school I was in growing up, they always cautioned us that we didn’t have armor for our backs, and that we had to stand firm when facing any kind of spiritual assault or attack. All our spiritual armor is front-facing, there is no allowance for retreat, even in the fiercest battle.
From Pilgrim’s Progress:
Why do people usually respond wrong when going through the Valley of Humiliation?
In one word, it is their pride. Pride and arrogance are what keeps us from seeing our own flaws, or from wanting to acknowledge our own blind spots or mistakes, especially when someone has pointed them out. Doubly so if it is someone we despise. And even more so than that if it is done in public meant to humiliate us. But none of that takes away the true value of humiliation.
For one, it serves to rid us of our pride or pretenses, if we allow it to, by acknowledging that we really aren’t perfect and may even need to go through this valley at this time. If we repent of our pride, we are given grace to endure the season, and hope for what lies ahead (a better character for one thing). But when we respond in pride toward our humbling, we don’t glean the benefits or blessings of learning humility, and our character is left with a glaring defect. Remember: God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. It is also foolish to honor an arrogant person, Paul tells us to give honor to those who deserve it because of their service and humility.
So many harmful things come from pride, because it allows us to keep moving in the wrong direction and often toward danger. Unnecessary hardships, shipwrecking of one’s faith or the faith of others, and even important relationships can be destroyed when someone refuses to be humbled or accept rebuke and correction (be humiliated to a lesser or greater extent). When we go through this Valley of Humiliation, we have God’s favor on our life if we keep a humble heart.
Although a person’s pride may make them seem strong, their strength is in their folly, which is why the Bible constantly warns against arrogance and pride, boasting of one’s sins they’ve gotten away with, or having a Pharisaical attitude and legalism. It is a mysterious thing that the last will become first, that the humble will receive honor (and the arrogant, dishonor), but this is the way of our Lord. It takes Strength and Humility to accept rebuke or harsh criticism, to take it in stride, learning how to correct our character for the better, and not holding on to bitterness or resentment. Resisting this Valley is only human and natural, but nothing could be further from our benefit.
Often the truly strong are the humbled people, and those who are acutely aware of their own failings and shortcomings in the flesh.
May you find a man who displays this kind of character, the character of your own father, because a life with him will be easier due to his wisdom and strength, as you’ve seen from witnessing his life and what a great man he is.
There is Unexpected Beauty in the Valley of Humiliation
From the second book written by John Bunyan, the one that chronicle’s the Pilgrim’s wife’s journey with their four sons, we will look at how beautiful this Valley can be when you have gotten the proper perspective.
From Christiana’s journey, on the Valley of Humiliation:
“It is the best and most fruitful piece of ground in all those parts. It is fat ground, and as you see, consisteth much in meadows; and if a man was to come here in the summer-time, as we do now, if he knew not any thing before thereof, and if he also delighted himself in the sight of his eyes, he might see that which would be delightful to him.
Behold how green this valley is; also how beautified with lilies. (Song. 2:1). I have known many laboring men that have got good estates in this Valley of Humiliation; for God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace to the humble. (Jas. 4:6; 1 Pet. 5:5). Indeed it is a very fruitful soil, and doth bring forth by handfuls. Some also have wished that the next way to their Father’s house were here, that they might be troubled no more with either hills or mountains to go over; but the way is the way, and there is an end.
Now, as they were going along, and talking, they espied a boy feeding his father’s sheep. The boy was in very mean clothes, but of a very fresh and well-favoured countenance; and as he sat by himself, he sung. Hark, said Mr. Great-Heart, to what the shepherd’s boy saith. So they hearkened and he said,
He that is low, no pride:
He that is humble, ever shall
Have God to be his guide.
Little be it or much;
And, Lord, contentment still I crave,
Because thou savest such.
That go on pilgrimage;
Here little, and hereafter bliss,
Is best from Age to Age.”
Then said the guide, Do you hear him? I will dare to say, that this boy lives a merrier life, and wears more of that herb called heart’s-ease in his bosom, than he that is clad in silk and velvet. But we will proceed in our discourse.
In this valley our Lord formerly had his country-house: he loved much to be here. He loved also to walk these meadows, for he found the air was pleasant. Besides, here a man shall be free from the noise, and from the hurryings of this life: all states are full of noise and confusion; only the Valley of Humiliation is that empty and solitary place. Here a man shall not be so let and hindered in his contemplation as in other places he is apt to be.
This is a valley that nobody walks in but those that love a pilgrim’s life. And though Christian had the hard hap to meet here with Apollyon, and to enter with him in a brisk encounter, yet I must tell you, that in former times men have met with angels here, (Hos. 12:4,5), have found pearls here (Matt. 13:46), and have in this place found the words of life. (Prov. 8:36). Did I say our Lord had here in former days his country-house, and that he loved here to walk? I will add-in this place, and to the people that love and trace these grounds, he has left a yearly revenue, to be faithfully paid them at certain seasons, for their maintenance by the way, and for their further encouragement to go on in their pilgrimage.
Samuel: Now, as they went on, Samuel said to Mr. Great-Heart, Sir, I perceive that in this valley my father and Apollyon had their battle; but whereabout was the fight? for I perceive this valley is large.
Great-heart: Your father had the battle with Apollyon at a place yonder before us, in a narrow passage, just beyond Forgetful Green. And indeed that place is the most dangerous place in all these parts. For if at any time pilgrims meet with any brunt, it is when they forget what favours they have received, and how unworthy they are of them. This is the place also where others have been hard put to it. But more of the place when we are come to it; for I persuade myself that to this day there remains either some sign of the battle, or some monument to testify that such a battle there was fought.
Mercy: Then said Mercy, I think I am as well in this valley as I have been anywhere else in all our journey: the place, methinks, suits with my spirit. I love to be in such places, where there is no rattling with coaches, nor rumbling with wheels. Methinks, here one may, without much molestation, be thinking what he is, whence he came, what he has done, and to what the King has called him. Here one may think, and break at heart, and melt in one’s spirit, until one’s eyes become as the fish-pools in Heshbon (Song. 7:4). They that go rightly through this valley of Baca, make it a well; the rain that God sends down from heaven upon them that are here, also filleth the pools. This valley is that from whence also the King will give to his their vineyards; and they that go through it shall sing, as Christian did, for all he met with Apollyon. (Ps. 84:5-7; Hos. 2:15).
Great-heart: ‘Tis true, said their guide; I have gone through this valley many a time, and never was better than when here. I have also been a conduct to several pilgrims, and they have confessed the same. “To this man will I look,” saith the King, “even to him that is poor, and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word.” (Isa. 66:2).
So… even with all we’ve gone over just now, are you surprised that going through times of extreme hardship or testing may be met with such peace and spiritual renewal? 🙂 Again, I can only explain it as the mysteries of our God, and how wonderful He is to have designed our spiritual journey in this way.
So go through these valleys with confidence and assurance that He is faithful and will provide a path for you. If you meet with assault or attack, stand firm in your armor, like Christian, and do not flee. Allow any convictions of your spirit to alter your character to make sure you are right with God. Never underestimate the foolishness of the heart, and how it can deceive us into believing that we are in the right, if you feel conviction you are in the wrong. Accept it, reject pride, and allow your character to be refined in this Valley.
And from James:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
Lord have mercy! This is just insane. I feel sorry for this woman, celebrity Nicky Hilton, but oh. my. gosh. I don’t care WHAT is in fashion when you are a teen Little One, but you
ARE NOT GOING OUT OF THE HOUSE IN ANYTHING REMOTELY LIKE THIS.
And this was just days before this woman’s wedding day, where she chose a much more flattering dress (thank goodness).
But the damage was already done to her reputation. It was reported (and maybe caught on camera?) that she accidentally FLASHED people in the first dress… again, just days before her wedding :O 😦 . You may think that because she found maybe a good man that you can pull this off, too, but no… don’t even try that. She’s rich, Sweetie, and you’re not a millionaire heiress lol!
No husband wants a woman who was flashing the public due to her stupidity in wearing an immodest dress, so it calls into question the kind of man she’s secured.
Think about it. Coming from the man’s perspective, he’s marrying a woman who just flashed the public (and possibly the world) days before their wedding. How would his family react to seeing that published?
“A beautiful woman who lacks discretion,
is like a gold ring in a pig’s snout.”
You’re going to have to get used to us saying “No,” when it comes to crazy fashion ideas or teen shenanigans in order to protect you. A lot of it is going to be protecting you from yourself, in a way, because sometimes women seem to lack any shred of common sense!
Being Christian, this should bother the body of Christ and be something that’s talked about.
Dressing immodest just screams you want sexual attention
Over the years, it really has proven itself over and over again to me, that even the most modest seeming woman (no matter her age I think), seems to desire attention. This happens even if she’s not aware of it consciously, but probably most are aware of it, and just suppress it or lie to themselves that it’s not that bad. Even, unfortunately, sexual attention that is truly inappropriate. This shows itself in different ways depending on the woman, but again, I’ve found this to be true across the board, no matter who you’re dealing with.
Dressing immodestly exacerbates this issue, and takes it to a whole new level of shameless advertising of one’s feminine body. It really is making it obvious to men (and other women, who will not like it) that you are seeking sexual attention overtly.
You’ll scare the good men away
But perhaps the main reason this topic is so important for you to understand, is because if you do decide to dress like this once you’re grown up, you WILL NOT be attracting the kind of men who are of good character. The kind of men who will make good, trustworthy husbands who actually have integrity.
To put it plainly, you’ll scare the good men away, and rightfully so, because good Christian men DO NOT want a woman (or wife) who dresses like a prostitute!
I feel like this should be a given, and I know you’ll grow up hearing this rationally and practically so much that you’ll probably feel like this is a given, too, but apparently in our world, even Christian women like yourself should be allowed to wear skintight apparel, or spaghetti strap tops around men in public, or mini skirts, or a myriad of other immodest selections. You will see as you grow up, that even in the church it is becoming “taboo” to enforce any kind of dress code, which DOES NOT benefit the fellow Christians (not the young men or older men, and certainly not the women who dress this way at Church).
So it’s either that you’ll scare the good men away, or they’ll just use you in a weak moment. One thing for certain is that dressing like this will attract men of bad character. Or it will encourage men of good character, to view YOU as having bad character.
Whichever way you look at it, it’s just not good for you, Sweet One.
Quick Link List
- Sigma Frame’s Why Are Christian Women Known as Whores?
- Wintery Knight’s Lori Alexander is Right, Serious Christian Men Debt-Free Virgins w/o Tattoos
Every year it seems I write some kind of skincare update, based on my latest visit with my lifelong dermatologist doctor, and this one certainly didn’t disappoint. I’ve been going to this awesome woman since I was between 11 and 12 years old, and it still just feels so nice that she knows alllllll the history of my skin (and life!). I can relax and trust she knows how to treat my latest skin issues. It is a VERY nice thing feeling like you’re in such capable hands.
This year, I wondered what my skin would look like age-wise in her magnified, super powerful, UV-ray damage viewing glasses, as it’s varied throughout the years pretty dramatically depending on how well I was taking care of it or outright neglecting it. And I’m so happy to report that my skin is still looking youthful and dewy and even… ahem… a little bit “glowing,” probably from all the exercise we’ve been doing. I’ve never had oily skin, but she remarked on how it was almost on the verge of being “oily” (wow!!).
So… those products I blogged about here last year, they REALLY held up. I just ran out of the Glytone, and the pure Retinol still has 50% of the tube!!!! Shows you how little you need to use, and how far your dollar stretches!!! And my skin is youthful, glowing and happy ❤
Now… for the hilarious part 😀 I’ve had a bright red tiny tiny spot (almost like a pen mark) on my nose since being pregnant with our daughter… so it’s been there for almost two years. I thought it would go away, and sometimes I’d totally forget about it, last year it wasn’t “dealt” with at my appointment even at all. But this year, it’s been bothering me more to feel like I had to wear concealer over it (when I’d prefer to go makeup-less), and so I thought I’d bring it up and ask her what on earth it was? And if it ever really would go away on it’s own?
Apparently, it was a super tiny broken blood vessel, very much like a spider vein of some kind; she suggested I got it from pregnancy, as it’s a normal thing for women. She said she could treat it right there and got out her powerful magnifying glasses and laid me back and went to work! Lord have mercy, she took out the longest needle I’ve seen since my epidurals!!!!! And proceeded to stab my nose and get rid of the tiny dot. She let me know I had a ton more that she could see better with her uber UV ray-damage glasses… and proceeded to stab my face maybe 10 more times LOL!!!!!!!!!!
I swear… I’m lucky to be alive and typing this 😀 😛 By the time I was done, she handed me a mirror and miraculously, you couldn’t even TELL she had done ANYTHING, except for my nose being red from all the tears that involuntarily came out as she was stabbing my face! I’m not kidding, it hurt sooooooo bad that my eyes couldn’t hold in the waterworks!
She then tried to convince me not to have anymore children LOL. “Pregnancy is too hard on a woman’s face, are you sure you want to have more?” You’d have to know her to understand this 🙂 and since I have since I was a pre-teen, I understand where she’s coming from. Pregnancy IS hard on a woman’s body (and apparently her FACE lol), it’s hard on your pocket book, and on your personal level of career achievement (hence why I’m a stay at home mom still). She’s gorgeous, and she’s 53, my husband calls her Dr. Barbie (because she still looks very very good); she only had two children (and is one of the best doctors in our city… very very successful woman even with having kids). I can totally see how someone wouldn’t be able to understand why a woman would keep on having children when they, quite literally, take away your outer beauty and youth. It get it, but children are so much more valuable than preserving my face and body.
Well, the red dot is gone, and I feel like a walking Frankenstein 😀 but I answered her question with a resounding and hopeful yes, we’re still going to try to have another baby if we can.
Beauty be damned!
MARRIAGE IS NOT BEAUTIFUL
“Marriage is ugly. You will spend the rest of your life seeing the absolute best and worst in someone. You will see them when they are mad, sad, stubborn, and so unlovable that they make you want to scream. You will witness parts of them no one will ever see but you. They will ignite all sorts of emotions that include anger, weeping, laughter and joy.
Marriage isn’t a beautiful thing, but it is amazing. It is knowing that someone loves you and won’t leave you even when you are being nasty. It is having someone who’s got your back no matter what. It is fighting over stupid things, falling asleep in each others arms, and feeling like there will never be enough time to spend together.
Marriage is the dirtiest, hardest, most rewarding job there is because at the end of the day you get to crawl into bed with your best friend, the weirdest, most annoying, loving, goofy, perfect person that you will ever know.
Marriage is not beautiful but it is quite an adventure!”
I came across this online today, and kind of went “Huh?”
I get it that marriage has difficult moments because both the husband and wife are human (and sinners) and we just kind of have a human knack for selfishness… BUT it shouldn’t always feel ugly or be this way.
I know I’ve gotten criticized for being an envy inciter for posting happy pictures or talking about how good marriage can be, but perhaps it’s my optimism that helps me focus on the positives. I would just never call marriage “ugly.”
To me, it really is beautiful. Yes, even with the misunderstandings, or when dealing with an imperfect human… when you talk it out together, forgive each other and choose move on, it does feel beautiful. Misunderstandings and working through problems can actually bring couples closer when they do it peacefully and keep the end goal in mind (of staying close together in oneness).
But I guess that would mean women need to take responsibility for their bad behavior in a marriage (or should I call it toxic femininity LOL?).
There are many behaviors that could make a woman (or a man) feel like marriage is indeed, ugly. Especially their own marriage if these behaviors are present.
We really shouldn’t just allow ourselves as women to be “nasty,” toward our husbands. That should be obvious. And we shouldn’t allow ourselves to pick fights over “stupid” things. There’s wisdom in bringing topics up in a peaceful way, or in choosing one’s battles. Having a peaceful and loving attitude does wonders for maintaining a happy marriage. This means you shouldn’t be so uptight with your husband that you make everything a fight.
I’m not saying that a wife will be able to never have moments of acting sinful toward her husband (“nasty” or fighting over stupid things), but when it does happen, there should be true repentance. Letting your husband know you will try to not act like that again is also helpful in him forgiving you. I do believe that with the fruits of the Holy Spirit at work in a Christian woman’s life, a woman doesn’t have to fall into repeat patterns of “nastiness.” Even a bad case of PMS shouldn’t make a woman feel the “freedom,” to lash out at her husband. Because lashing out shouldn’t be a freedom. And no, marriage shouldn’t be ugly.
An adventure? Yes, and I’d like to say it’s a good one to be on.