Merry Christmas!

One of the things I love about this time of year is the going to parties and seeing friends and family.  We just had our annual Police Dance event, which is very similar in ways to a Military Ball event.

It’s a dance and it’s supposed to be for fun and entertainment, but it’s also very much a work event.  We had actually never gone before, so it was fun to read up on all the military ball etiquette advice.  It was a lot more relaxed, but the etiquette was proved to be useful just as well.

We had so much fun! 😀 ❤

Everyone there was dressed so nice, the food was amazing, and we were able to have a nice night, kid-free, to actually get out and dance.

My husband announced to me that we “have” to do this every year from now on 😀  It’s not mandatory like a lot of the Military Balls are, but still, it was very much a networking event, and a perfect “date night” to boot complete with live bands playing for music!

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My husband is not really a picture-taking person, but man he took a ton of pics and videos that night, a lot of them selfies of us together ❤  Really romantic 🙂

My only jewelry were two pearl and diamond pins in my hair, and of course, his badge necklace.

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When my husband smiles like this, I KNOW something is going right 😀 ❤ ❤ ❤

He was so happy that night.  He doesn’t drink either, and the drinks were all free!  So this was a real, natural high on the joy of the moment ❤

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A better picture of the dress I wore. It’s actually a dress from when I was 16 or 17, but it still fit and I thought it would be gown-appropriate, floor-length attire.

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Everyone’s dresses were so beautiful – I LOVED seeing all the girlfriends and wives dressed up 😀  What a nice way to celebrate together… someone remarked, “We all clean up pretty nice!”  LOL

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Merry Christmas readers!  Hope you all find joy and meaning in the spirit of Christmas this year!

Stephanie

 

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Vamped up V-Day

 

  1. Wear something excruciatingly sexy for your husband tonight… something he can’t possibly resist.
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La Perla from Italian Vogue

2. Indulge your senses… embrace your sensuality… in other words, involve some incredible tasting food (and wine if you will).

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3. Rival Godiva… there is nothing so sexy as to learn to do it yourself!

Vamp up your V-Day & be good to your love.

Ambitions: Are you an Intellectual, a Realist, or a Romantic?

According to Dr. Abraham Low, a founder of a psychotherapy practice called Recovery in the 1950’s, most people fall into a habit of acquiring a particular philosophy in life.  He claims there are three: intellectualism, romanticism, and realism.  Since I love people and love understanding the basics of human interactions, their thoughts, and the motivations behind why people act in certain ways, this 1950’s book is still fascinating to me.

He describes the romantic as being led mostly by their feelings, letting their feelings be known almost as soon as they are felt.  “He prides himself on being frank and above-board. ‘What is wrong about expressing a feeling?’  asks the romantic enthusiast…  He will tell you, without mincing words, that your furniture is not properly arranged, that if he had planned a house like yours the rooms or entrances or exits would have been differently placed.”

“If it is a woman romantic she will intimate plainly that she has no taste for your jewelry (or makeup) and that her way of cooking a roast is different and ‘if you want to get a real coat let me take you to my tailor.’  It is all an expression of feelings and if in the process the feelings of others are hurt, well, it is about time they got used to language that ‘comes straight from the shoulder.'”

and the realist…

“The realist is inclined to control his feeling and thought responses; the romantic and intellectual tend to express them.  It is all a matter of your philosophy (of life), and if your philosophy is realistic you will exercise control; if it is romantic your feelings may be expressed the moment they are aroused; if it is intellectual your thoughts will tend to be voiced the very instant they are born.”

Realists view themselves with humility, romantics tend to have a very high (and usually unrealistic) view of themselves, and they view things that happen to them in life as extraordinary or unique. 

Intellectuals feel they know things the average person does not – they believe they are unique because of their greater ability to think differently. 

“The intellectual mentality, the counterpart of the romantic soul….  His stock in trade is the insistence, repeated tirelessly and ruthlessly, that he is right, that you better take his advice, that he could have told you how to avoid trouble if you had only cared to listen to him….

Thinking that he is right he promptly assumes that the others are wrong.  Hence, he delights in correcting the statements and opinions of those about him.  He is critical, aggressive, meddlesome.  He not only knows things but knows them better than others.  His views are advanced and modern, theirs are stand-pattish and outmoded.  His supreme delight is to change things, to reform laws and institutions, to do away with the old and to create something new….”

It’s best to be realistic.  Everyone is unique in their own way, and I truly believe everyone is special and has special talents of their own and gifts to give to the world – but it’s best to do so in the humble way of realism.  Pride is destructive, and both the romantic and intellectual are fraught with it.  They consider themselves to be overly wise and all-knowing, neglecting the fact that we are all human and all prone to mistakes – and to arriving at improper conclusions based on our feelings or thoughts.  Low constantly insists that you have to align both to outer reality and to facts.

It’s interesting, the more I’ve learned in life, the more I’ve realized that you cannot ever know everything – and to try to pretend so, is to make assumptions that are harmful to you and to the relationships you have.  

Be humble, but also be brave and creative, it is the only worthwhile way to live.

And lastly:

“Exceptionality is a hope, a dream, an illusion… Averageness is the reverse; it is a subtle fear, a sober fact, a disillusioned self-appraisal, that means a plain, uninspiring reality.  People hope to be exceptional and fear to be nothing but average.  If you choose to live in a world of hopes, dreams and illusions you are a sentimentalist; if you prefer the realm of factual existence and everyday life you are a realist…. You are what you are: sentimental and realistic, imaginative and matter-of-fact at the same time.  What counts is the proportion, balance, and ratio.  Does your realism outweight your sentimentalism?  Or does the balance tilt in the opposite direction?”

(quotes from Mental Health Through Will-Training, Abraham Low M.D., 1950)