Why I Wear My Hair Long… Even with a Baby

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I know this is a sensitive subject (anything to do with a woman’s beauty is a sensitive subject lol) and this is a personal choice… but women who wear their hair down are almost universally perceived as feminine and alluring.  Hair is such a gift God’s given us to enhance our natural beauty.  And it is one of the main things men find sexy or attractive about a woman.  It’s her hair.

It’s normal in America for married women to either cut their hair short after kids, or just always wear it up. this isn’t so in many areas of Europe or even some other Eastern cultures where even older women wear their hair long.  As a result, I’ve read reports from men who have traveled to these areas, that they are AMAZED how sexy and beautiful even the older women are.  And it’s LARGELY because of 1) their attractive slender shapes and 2) their HAIR!

I’ve written about this hair topic a few years before when Dr. Laura described it as American (or Western culture women) having something called “frump syndrome.”  Even reading it, it just sounds scary!  It’s when women stop wearing makeup and always wear their hair up (hardly ever styled) and generally don’t care how they’re dressing now that they’re either 1) married, or 2) a stay at home mom with little kids or babies.  It’s pretty common, especially the hair thing.  It’s also really unattractive 😦 especially to men.

I think most women do this unconsciously.  They fall into a routine of always putting their hair up in a pony tail or bun and never think about how much better (more feminine) they’d look if they put more effort into wearing their hair down.  If you’re married, it’s selfish to never care about the way you wear your hair, or to start dressing frumpy just because you’re a stay at home mommy.  I know that sounds harsh, but you don’t see working women dressing the way us stay at home moms tend to (ouch!).  It’s because they know their workplace and their boss has higher standards of appearance.  Well, turns out most husbands also want to see you putting effort into your hair, makeup and clothes, even if you stay home with the kids.  To me this all makes sense… if a woman puts effort to look nice when she goes out for other people (or her own self-respect) of course she should put in effort on a daily basis for her husband who sees her at home.  It’s a major sign of disrespect to never put an effort into making yourself look more feminine or beautiful, even while staying at home.  And the BIGGEST contributing factor to a woman’s femininity is arguably, her hair.

It’s our most powerful “accessory.” 😉 ❤

For many women, it takes more work to wear your hair down, which is why they probably don’t do it.  I have to make sure it’s styled because my hair has insane body and sometimes frizz and doesn’t tend to look great when I just wake up.  So it takes a little bit of effort – not even that much though, like 5-10 minutes depending on the day, but my  husband is CRAZY about it when I wear it long and flowing.  And compliments me on it frequently.

Just this morning he walked in when I happened to be changing… my long hair was falling down over my breasts, and he was taken aback for a moment watching me… and called me his Lady Godiva!  ❤

He loves it, and he notices it all the time.  But the truth is… he wouldn’t even SEE how long it is if I always wore it up daily when working around the house.  He (and I!) would be missing out a big part of my feminine beauty if I selfishly daily hid my hair away from him.  It’s the little things that tend to enhance the romance in a marriage, and this is just one of the many “little things,” in my opinion.

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Even Prince George likes to get in on the action!

With a baby, I get it, it’s easier to put it up, but don’t put it up all the time, even if you do have a baby.  Put up with a little hair pulling 😉  I’m going through this right now, literally lol with my 4 month old.  You can teach them not to pull it so much.  And your husband will appreciate seeing you looking more feminine and beautiful – showing him you care about his desire to see you that way.

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Mommy, you just look SO beautiful!  Me HAS to stroke and grab your pwetty hair!

And obviously for doing chores, it needs to be out of the way so you don’t get frustrated and ca see what you’re doing.  But for things like carrying the baby around, breastfeeding, making some snacks or lunches (where you’re hair is less likely to be in the way) try wearing it down and see how much more feminine you feel.

Try a challenge and wear it down mostly for the next week.  If you’re guilty of always wearing it up for comfort and not having to mess with it, this will probably be hard for you at first to get used to.

This also means you’ll have to spend some time to make it look actually presentable, because just wearing it down if it’s not clean, brushed, or at least styled, won’t have the same “beautiful” and feminine effect for you or your husband.

If it’s frizzy and wild, this means you’ll need to put in the time and effort to make it look nice when down.  You probably wore it down a lot when you were dating right?

Don’t go to the Frumpside.

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Good Morning Sunshine!

Try wearing it down.

Stephanie

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The Sexy Wife

When a couple is dating, there are certain expectations that each person needs for the romance to develop.  The man has to pursue, plan, and woo the woman, while the woman flirts, dresses with careful consideration, fixes her hair or make-up in anticipation of their dates or time together.  While they are out on a date, they listen to each other with avid interest, she respects him and doesn’t put him down or make him feel stupid – and he likewise.  

I had never heard of a married couple dating each other until I was a freshman in college and part of a Christian group on campus.  One of the mentors, still in her twenties, was newly married and unknowingly made a lasting impression on all of us who watched her become an amazing woman, wife, and eventually mother.  She cared about the way she presented herself, she spoke of how important it was to have date nights together, she taught us how important intimacy was – and not just sex, but physically touching your husband – there is something so powerful in touch.

Take care of yourself.  Respect your husband – don’t ever humiliate or make him into a joke – you’d never do that when you dating, and if you had, you would’ve been filed into the guys category or women who only remain guys’ friends because they’re too guy-like!  Act like a woman.

“Obviously, wives are female; women; girls….  After marriage, and definitely after having children, too many wives contract the “Frump syndrome,” the symptoms of which include wearing flannel pajamas and socks, or sweatpants with oversized T-shirts, to bed instead of some girly thing with lace; not shaving legs or grooming nails; not washing, styling, or even combing hair; taking off (instead of freshening up) makeup from the day just before your husband comes home; using the toilet with him in the room; not making an attempt to smell sweet (with a little perfume or body oil); and never putting on sexy outfits… in front of your husband.

When women have called in to my radio program to say that they are unhappy in their marriages, but nothing particularly is actually wrong, I ask them if they have contracted this ailment.  Almost universally, the answer is yes.  When I suggest the obvious cure, I am confronted with some angry, annoyed, resentful, defensive women!  It’s worrisome when women embrace the notion that once they are married, they are entitled to be loved, adored, protected, gifted, romanced, obeyed, and provided for without question, without reciprocation, and definitely without any effort on their part to create the emotional and psychological environment that would more likely get them all those desires.”  Schlessinger

Be a sexy wife – your husband will absolutely, hands-down, love it, and you will reap amazing rewards for treating him like a man.