This… is a photo I snapped of an ad we found in our mailbox for an auto-place in our city. At first glance, it just looks like they’re having fun, washing the car together, but unfortunately, it displays a whole lot more than that with body-language upon a closer look.
Who is in control?
The woman. Let’s take a long look at the woman. Really study her body language and features. Is she more masculine than your average female? This could be cute to me if she were more feminine looking, however, even her muscular structure looks more masculine than her husband’s. In this photo, she is the aggressive one, the one not only in control, but looking like she needs to be in control (and enjoying it). Look at the husband, really look. Not only is he displayed as more feminine, he is subjugating himself to her supposedly playful attack. I say supposedly because most men would not find themselves in his position (feeling over-powered by their masculine female partner) something that was “playful” for them, I think most men would not like to feel the feelings that his body language emits. Powerless. Wimpy. The posture of his hands saying, “Please stop.” He is under her dominion and out of his role as a strong, masculine, leader. Instead of strong, he looks weak. Instead of masculine, he looks strangely feminine here (and she looks unmistakably masculine). Instead of him leading, he is allowing her to control the situation.
An attractive man of course would love water play with his wife, but I doubt this would be how it would play out for him. He would probably find himself taking the hose from her and going after her with it. A feminine woman that respected her man would playfully go after him for sure! I’m not saying that the picture is in any way wrong for her having control of the hose, hear me out! I tease my husband all the time, even yesterday at a playground with our sons I had a moment of playful teasing with him in front of everyone there. My son and I decided we would try to hold down his arms on either side while he was taking a rest. Was he emasculated like this man in the photo? Not at all 😉 Quite the contrary… he laughed and flexed his arms inward, causing both of us to move closer as he did some quick move to tickle us both so that we screamed and jumped back from him!
We attacked his strength, but he remained in control all the while. He didn’t beg for mercy, I wasn’t able to truly overpower him (he is much stronger, with more muscle mass than I’ll ever have). It was the opposite of what is displayed in this photo.
I know it may seem strange to go into this depth of a simple mailbox ad, but as our culture becomes more and more anti-male/pro-woman, things like this ad – displaying a man counter to what you would expect, as well as the woman with her muscles and body-language over-powering his weak display, I find it a little offensive. I’m not keen on living in a society where my boys will be told (or shown from every angle) that they exist to be a footstool to women who are power hungry and who think they are more masculine than them. I’m not happy about being in a culture where masculinity is best displayed as a weak, mercy-pleading male.
It’s the opposite of how God intended men and women to be, a perversion of the sexes and their innate strengths and beauty.