With my pregnancy with boy #2 well on its way at 20 weeks this weekend, and my husband’s and my anniversary being today, 7 years of learning and growing together ❤ , motherhood has been on my mind a lot lately. My husband is working a difficult schedule from afternoon into late at night; he’s gone right after lunch, and comes home long after our son’s been asleep. This means that our adorable son only gets to see his dad in the morning, and loves to push the limits with me in the afternoons and evenings – often driving me insane. 🙂 This also means that I appreciate my husband all the more for how much he really contributes to child-rearing, and helping me with household chores!
The frustration has made me realize the importance of really being a good mother – a consistent, patient, loving, and caring mother – even when you are pregnant, tired, moody, and your little son is realizing he can get away with more when dad’s not around! I have to constantly remind myself that the pregnancy is why I feel exhausted and extremely low energy, and that my son still needs me to be the best mom I can possibly be right now, regardless. I’m glad I have my own models of motherhood to look up to – my own mother, and various other women who were so supportive and unselfish for the only sake of the children under their care or around them.
Its a beautiful and challenging model of motherhood for me, and of trying to be better at all of it, for his well-being.
Here are some character traits I was thinking about early this morning, things I want to focus on more and develop my inner being’s muscles in:
To be truly attune to my son – interested in him and everything he is doing and telling me. To really listen to him and his concerns, his adorable thoughts, and most importantly, his questions. He asks the most interesting and deep questions about life for a child who just turned 4 years old this summer. He’s so intelligent and understands things beyond I’m sure, what I understood at that age.
To make bedtime like it used to be – before I was lacking energy, moody, and pregnant. I’ve always thought that bedtime was the best time to have one last impact on your child’s day – to get last words in of counsel, or assurance, and a last attempt at praying and leaving them with spiritual guidance. Even reading to them (which has always been part of our bedtime routine) simply shows them how much you VALUE them as people in their own right. Without my husband being there for support and literal “back-up,” bedtime has been rushed and stressful at best, and tumultuous at worst! I’m amending this… bedtime is supposed to be peaceful, reassuring, and that last push for connection and love that can last a lifetime of remembrance for my son.
To be kind, even when tantrums are at their peak and I’m thoroughly exhausted from what seems like endless confrontations. 🙂 He is the most assertive little one I know – whereas my husband and I are both extremely easy going people, our son (at this age at least) is definitely more head strong, and takes more energy to constantly explain and discipline. Even though he may be harder in this one way, I wouldn’t have him any different, he is so wonderful and is such a complex mixture of tender-hearted sweetness.
There are so many other wonderful traits to mention, to be caring, honest with him, supportive, affectionate, loving, selfless, being strong (having strength to endure times like my husband’s schedule), having great humor, creativity to ease stress, ingenuity, and stability no matter our circumstances or my cocktail of pregnancy hormones. 🙂